middle school rejection

Apparently, this is a week full of nostalgia for me. I do tend to look back a lot, actually. I’m the type of person that likes to look at pictures and old journals and notes from people I don’t talk to anymore and think about stuff. Mostly how those people all kinda suck. And maybe how much better off I am now that I don’t talk to them anymore. This was the theme for my evening tonight. Buntport is doing this thing called Teacher’s Pet. Basically they have a theme and people have 5 minutes to read something or tell a story or sing a song about the theme. In February the theme was High School Confidential (old journal entries and yearbooks). I read from my journal from after 6th grade about my first kiss with Chris Davenport (he was dreamy . . . sigh . . . ) and then about my prom date (Brian Schoep) who made out with my friend Andrea in her tree-house at the after party. So last night, the theme was break-up notes and rejection letters. The only real break-up note that I have ever received was actually from three of my friends in the 8th grade. It reads like this:

Becca- (my name was actually misspelled Rebbeca on the front of the note- and these were my CLOSE friends!)

We talked it over and decided we don’t like you anymore.

Love, Allison, Erin and Elizabeth K.

[PS] I know it’s mean, but we aren't the only ones who feel this way. Take what you do (like cry to[o] much) into consideration.

That’s it. Two sentences. At the time (as you can imagine) that note rocked my world. When I look back on it now (more than 10 years later) that note actally was a turning point in my life. That note helped me make the final decision about where I was going to go to high school. Up until that point, I was still considering going to South, because that was where all of my friends were going. Of course, when three of your good friends give you a note like this, the idea of going to four more years of school with them becomes a bit less appealing. The great thing is that I went to West, met some great people (including Mitch) who introduced me to more great people (including the Buntporters) so when you think about it, that note led me to being onstage last night reading that note. If they had never written that to me, maybe I would have gone to South, never met anyone and would therefore not have been at Buntport last night to read (plus I wouldn’t have had anything to read). Or maybe (if you believe in fate) I would have found my way to Buntport last night anyway, because that is what was meant to be. Or something. Anyway, so that note changed my life. And even though at the time it was painful (middle school girls are mean!) my life is better for it. I think I am a better person and I think that my life has gone in a better direction. So thank you to Allison, Erin and Elizabeth K, wherever you are, for rejecting me; it’s meant a lot to me

On another note: Shout out to my friends the Flobots (no w). I saw them at Herman's Hideaway on Sat night. You can see them at Red Rocks with the fray on August 6th. Or if you don't want to wait that long (or pay that much) see them at Cervantes Ballroom on May 11. And thanks for always inspiring me guys. I love ya.

You are not alone
You don't have to do this on your own
You won't have to prove yourself to get through this
Don't have to lose yourself to this music
In fact you might find yourself
In a room full of strangers trying to help
In a flashback to the last time you felt
The presence of something divine well, this is
Hip-hop it's not just for profit anymore never was
It's too easy to live your life waiting for change to arrive if it ever does
It will come from a source that's infinite, not from a middle man
You can't measure it's force but you've got a sense of it,
and it's bigger than Hip (hop)

it's larger than life/death

much greater than us/them

One Love Agape One Love Agape